Teacher Mentality

I may not be in a traditional classroom setting at a traditional educational institution, but I AM a teacher.

Lately, I have grown a whollllle new appreciation for teachers. I now find myself getting frustrated when I ask a thought provoking question just to get a smart ass response. I become frustrated at the ones who show out and not take it seriously, potentially hindering the learning process for the ones who are taking it seriously. I find myself asking myself, "Why can't they just grow the hell up?". And then it hit me...

Maybe people don't necessarily need to "grow up", rather they need to grow out. Out of their habits, out of their toxic mindset, and out of their cycle of self sabotage and deprivation. Maybe they need to grow out of their shell, out of hiding, out of their own way. It may not be an interest in positively engaging in their life that is lacking, rather, it may be a lack of education or confidence on how to do so. So maybe, just maybe, they need to be helped OUT, not helped UP.

Different group dynamics require different approaches. Sometimes,  I need to facilitate thinking, not facilitate a class. I need to listen to questions rather than just trying to answer them. I need
 remember that success is not a guarantee, rather it is an option.

I need to realize that even if I only reach 3 of 30 people in my classes, it doesn't mean I've only made a difference in 3 lives. I recently realized that those 3 people will be utilizing the skills and reaching other people in their lives with what they learn in my class. So while I may have only directly had a positive impact on the 3 lives, the potential of indirect impact is....well, endless.

This is why it is so important to appreciate the small things. What people don't realize is that we are all teachers. We all learn from each other. We are all making a difference and having an impact, so it is very important to make it a good one. Be mindful of your attitude, your actions, your outlook, and your communication....you never know who is learning from you.

If we want to continue teaching, we have to continue learning.

Peace and Joy,
Beth

Life Update

Well, a lot has unfolded in the past few weeks. 

First, I started running on a regular basis again. Why is this a big deal? Because I am a runner, and that is what we do....we run. It feels good to say that again. I forgot how uplifting it is to take out any negative emotion on the pavement. It is with every drop of sweat that my body is letting go of something it wants to reject. I just kind of let it all go.... I think about what I want to "run off" and I just let my mind take me to a place of peace. Clarity peruses.

Secondly, I have been in contact with people that really want to work toward a mission to revolutionize recovery. I talk about alignment a lot, and it seems to be falling into place. Meeting people with the same ideas, passions and ambitions is really a beautiful thing. Making this dream a reality is somewhat anxiety provoking because I don't want to fail, but to be a part of something that could potentially be life changing for so many people in our community is blissfully and organically intoxicating in itself.  I am so so very excited to see what comes of this.... I have no words. Oh, and the support I have behind me to go forward is amazing. To be believed in, to be trusted...it is an extraordinary feeling, to say the least.

Thirdly, I feel like I am making progress in my classes at Serenity. I feel like I am reaching more people. That is until last night's class. Before I knew it, half of them had gotten up and left. The topic was emotional intelligence and morals. It turned into a class of trying to understand the differences in thinking and feeling between men and women. I told myself not to be bothered about those who left, because lets face it...many of them are not ready to read into their emotions. Hell, sometimes I have problems doing it myself. It can be overwhelming, especially coming off of substances used to suppress them for so long. I did not take them leaving personally. I have learned  a lot about inventory, and maybe them leaving had to do with issues pertaining to their inventory, and i cannot take responsibility for that. All I can do is continue to teach the ones who are in a place where they are accepting of the information. To my surprise, the ones I thought would leave, stayed. Then there were the ones who stayed that didn't surprise me at all. I know which ones are thirsty for knowledge....they make me proud to be a part of their journey. 

Fourthly, the book. The AA book I have been reading....can I just say, this can apply to EVERYONE. What I have learned about inventory....my gosh the clarity and organization of issues! I suggest everyone delve into this step. At first, I believed it to be self sabotaging, but the more I read, the more I understood it is quite the opposite. It is about prioritizing, organizing and understanding YOUR issues and how they pertain to YOU, and what areas of life they impact. What you resent, what character flaws are present, what fears you have..etc. Then you take it a step further and self-explore to see what it is about these admissions that make you feel they are a part of your inventory. THEN you go even further and understand how and in what areas they have affected your life. Self-esteem, intimacy, relationships, pride, security...etc.. It is as if your mind is a map, and this technique is the GPS system to navigate and make sense of it all. 

Lastly, communication. I just got one of the best pieces of advice about communication. I was asked by someone whom I have a hell of a lot of respect for to refrain from using the phrase "for some reason". At first, I was so confused. Then I realized how often I used that phrase. It was explained to me that when I use that phrase I am basically telling myself and telling those I am communicating with that I am not aware of why I feel a certain way, or why things happen, when in reality I know exactly why. It is almost a mask to hide behind....it is saying, "you're important enough to know that there is a problem that I need to vent about, but not important enough for me to really tell you what is going on." Own the fact that you know why you feel you do, or why you do what you do. Own it because if you don't you will keep writing it off as unimportant and it will never really get resolved when it surfaces later and you wonder why. Also, if you say "for some reason" it leaves those who you are communicating to with the notion that they need to help you figure out why, when in reality, that effort is not needed, nor is it their responsibility to just know exactly what you mean. Funny how little phrases that we use every day can hinder communication with those who are really in tune to the technicalities behind the different parts of communication. Makes you think. Makes you wonder how many times conversations and messages have been misconstrued because of unclear messages.

That's all I have for now. 

Peace and Joy,
Beth 

Questions and Naked Truths

What if we stripped our minds of fear and judgement? What if we exposed our brains to vulnerability? What if we took off the cloak that our thoughts hide behind? What type of person would you be if you exposed your truths?

The naked brain....what a though, right? As much information we take in, we also expell just as much. The observational question here is, do they match? We, as a people, tend to leave parts of ourselves a mystery. We opt to diclose different things about our lives to different people. Why do we censor ourselves to some and not others? Is it fear? Is it a protective factor? Is it our subconscious?

And is it in our best interest to process everything we take in? Does it result in a truer response, or does it allow us to edit the perceptions to better fit our lives? Do we make information relate to us? For instance, I find a way to make every song I hear apply to my life somehow. Now if I really had all the things in the songs I hear going on in my life, I would live in constant chaos....but I find myself enjoying the song so much more when I can find meaning in it.

Do we live up to our expectations, or do we try to live up to the expectations others have of us? And would we admit that?

Questions...we answer them every day. But have you ever stopped to think about what they do for us? No matter what the question, it makes us evaluate ourselves in order to come up with an answer. Favorite color, choice in music, which health insurance plan to go with. It's a wonder how some of us swear we don't know ourselves.

We hear "I dunno" all the time too. Do we really not know, or are we deflecting? Or are we too lazy to answer? Or is the question not challenging enough or intellectually stimulating enough?

Who knows....

It's A Process

Oh where to begin with this one...

As many of you may know, I am teaching economic stability, parenting and relationship skills classes to a group of men in an addiction treatment facility, but what you may no know is that I probably learn just as much from them as they do from me. It is quite an amazing journey.

They are so motivated, so open and so participatory. It really is more than I could ask for out of a group of people who are coming together to learn useful skills. I have been teaching there for months now, however, I feel like there is still a disconnect with several of the men there. I have had to dig deeeep inside myself and realize that while learning is a process for them, it is a process for me as well. So, I have collaborated with some of the guys there for feedback. What can I do to get through to everyone, I ask. Then it dawned on me....I may not get through to them all. It may just be a few. It may just be one.

And that is fine.

I see endless potential in a few of those guys, and I am dedicated to their success. I have developed a whole new passion for this area of work. There is a new spark, a new motivation. Do I feel like this is exactly where I am supposed to be right now? Absolutely. They make me want to revolutionize recovery. They inspire me. I am inspired by people all around me every day, but it has been a lonnng time since I have been inspired at work. It feels good.

But it isn't easy. It is hard. Very hard. I have not been in their shoes, I have not had their experiences. I have a different capacity for learning than they do. Not bigger or better....just different. I can empathize, but I cannot sympathize. It's frustrating because I don't want them to think I am above them, or I am just some female with an agenda as I stand behind the podium and teach from my manual. Discussions have gone awry, and have gotten heated, but we recovered with lessons learned.

So how do I teach a group of people about responsibility for their children, relationships, and finances when they are still working on their responsibilities for self? I don't have an answer. I have watched movies, documentaries, done research and still don't have an evolved enough idea of what to do. So I did something I have never done before.... I went straight to the source. I asked for help...from one of the participants. Through much discussion and much research, I am learning how to better communicate and get through to these men. I am learning their language, their learning styles, and where they are in their process.

So next week will be different. There will be no podium separating me from the class. I will be facilitating class with them rather than for them. I will do exercises that make us all appreciative to have to opportunity to be a part of something that is bigger than we are. Everyone in the room has a voice, and they will all be able to use them; they will all be heard. We will all matter. Once we break the barriers keeping the group from cohesive learning, we can all contribute to the lessons learned without fear of judgement and criticism.

Through this, I have found it motivates everyone. It is refreshing to get the perspective from who I am trying to educate, and I am sure it is refreshing to them to see me trying. I push them because I know they can do it, but some of them push right back. It is unfamiliar territory for me, but I love it! I have learned so much! They have people rooting for them, but I want to put my words into action. I want to let them know I am here and that I mean that. It's a process, but I am happy to report a few of the gentleman in there are seeking help through me, and I couldn't be more proud of them for their efforts. And the appreciation I have for the gentleman helping me better relate to these men is beyond words. I am blessed.

My point in all this is we are human. None of us know everything, but it should never mean that we should stop learning. It is okay to ask questions, that should never be a fear. The most unexpected things can teach us the most valuable lessons, so embrace all experiences. We are all right where we should be right now, so we should learn to fill in those pages with good influence, hard work and thanks so that the next chapter is rich with rewards and new opportunities to make a difference in our own lives as well as in the lives of others. We all serve a purpose, so make the most of it because you may only get one shot to make a difference in a person's life. You may be the only one making that difference.

Peace and Joy,
Beth

With This Year, I Thee Shed

A New Year resolution should be just that. It should resolve something, and in order to resolve something, one must first identify a problem. What worries me is that many people jump to the usual: lose weight, eat healthier, exercise more..etc. I'm guilty of this perpetual reasoning, by the way. However, I cannot help but to think if this is the biggest problem we see for ourselves, then how superficial are we as an ever evolving species?

I think we should start looking at what we can gain before what we can lose. That's right, I said the nasty G word...gain. you read that correctly, but hear me out....

Try to gain hope, faith, perspective, and awareness. Gain more accomplishments, motivation, autonomy, respect, generosity, kindness, and appreciation. Allow yourself to gain confidence, empathy, acceptance, imagination, experience, and courage. Gain more of an understanding for loyalty, forgiveness,  patience, and trust. Gain new traditions and hobbies. Gain more knowledge, compassion, and fulfillment.
More importantly, gain a giving nature, a thoughtful mind, a graceful soul, an unconditionally loving heart. 

Gain an altruistic mindset and benevolent spirit. Gain sight of beauty in all things and people, sight of silver linings, and sight into cultural differences.
Gain insight on political candidates that you have the freedom to vote for. Gain the ability to learn from differences in opinions rather than detest them. Gain a job that makes waking up something to look forward to and a partner that makes you feel that they were born for the sole purpose to coexist with you in everlasting harmony.

While those are just a few among the many of things you can work on gaining, gaining something this year doesn't sound half bad anymore now does it? However, I know some of you will be more inclined to maintain a focus on losing, so if you want to lose something, consider this:

Lose: negativity, regret, doubt, and selfishness. Lose constant complaints, bad attitudes, hate, blame, and excuses. Lose using manipulation, deceit, and judgement. Lose the concepts of  fear and what ifs. Lose self sabotaging behaviors, toxic people in your life, and narcissistic attitudes. Lose the unrealistic expectations, grudges, stress, and bad habits you have been holding on to.
Lose clothes you haven't worn in 3 years. your cell phone at dinner, and the procrastinating concept that you "will get to it later". Try losing yourself in meaningful conversations, in a good book, or in captivating lyrics of meaningful music. Lose the excessive make up, you're already beautiful.
Lose the word normal, because really, what does it mean, and who does it really apply to?
Lose the concept of "cutting to the chase", because the art of communication and story telling is already struggling to survive, and what a beautiful art it is.

You see, I personally would much rather have the weight of a few extra pounds evenly distributed all over my body than the weight of the world on my shoulders. Free yourself of the burden of living a less than mediocre life. Bask in the satisfaction of leading an incredible life by indulging yourself in endless helpings of constructive thoughts and optimism!

We are all broken in some form, but it doesn't make us damaged goods. We all have the ability to do better, be better, and feel better. If you can do good, and be good, and feel good, but you aren't quite there....ask yourself "what's stopping me?" And THAT....THAT my friends is what you need to lose. The weight of those restraints far outweigh the few extra pounds that make you feel unhappy. I would much rather have the body weight that at least keeps me warm than the mental weight that has the potential to make me cold.

So with this year, I thee shed....
I'm not saying I am going to be a brand new me, because honestly I'm not that unhappy with who I am. I am merely saying that I recognize my ability and my potential and I am simply going to just try a little harder to contribute to the good things life has to offer.

Much peace and joy,
Beth

Difference Maker

Well hello again! Sorry it has been so long. I can go into how busy I have been and how much I have had going on, but let's be real....they are just excuses. Bluntly, I have been lazy about doing the blog.

Usually, I am really inspired by one thing, or one lyric, or one person to write an entire blog about, and until this morning, I haven't felt compelled enough to actually have to think about what to write as my thought process has been unprovoked. See, lazy! However, thanks to a NeedtoBreathe song, I now have a mind full of insight!

While there are more species of living things that exist in our world than I can count, the one thing every one of them have in common is the ability to make a difference. We, as humans, almost have a responsibility to  make a difference because we have the inherent cognitive process that really voids us from any excuse to NOT be difference makers.

Think about the food chain...all living things depend on others to keep living....that is an obvious example of making a difference. However, we tend to only look at the obvious, and overlook the other ways that these things become difference makers. For instance, plants and trees in their natural state provide shade and even shelter to animals and insects and humans. Bees and other insects are mostly responsible for our yards blooming in the spring, making a difference in our landscape and overall joy about the beautiful season. Pets provide companionship, love, nurturing and therapy, and our love for them is reciprocated in more ways than we will ever understand. Fruits, vegetables, and other plants/flowers gives us nourishment for our bodies, dye pigments to color our world, fragrant expulsions that boost our serotonin levels, enrichment for our soil, nutrients for our skin and treatment for our ailments. Everything plays a part in something that keeps everything living....even if it is to sacrifice for the greater good.

So how can you be a difference maker? Will you help your neighbor with their yard? Will you save a life? Will you give someone random a complement? Are you going to make a commitment to make a difference every day no matter how big or small? Are you going to smile more, appreciate more, or enjoy each day more? Will you laugh more and worry less? Will you appreciate more and be annoyed less? Will you help others see how they are blessed? Will you help others on their spiritual, religious, faith-based journey?
More individualized ideas:
* Charge your service fee (lessons, handy work, landscaping...etc) based on income, because let's face it, you've been in a position before where you could have used a break yourself.
* If you can sing, set up on a popular street and just sing for people. Music heals so many souls.
* If you're an addict/recovering addict/friend or family member of an addict, become peer support for those who are in positions you understand.
* If you have the time, offer single parents a hand with running errands, cleaning house, cooking or simply watching their children while they get things done.
* If you are a server, donate a portion of your tips one night a month to a local charity
* If you are a high school senior, instead of doing a prank, write advice articles to leave behind for the freshman coming in next year.
* If you are an athlete, encourage younger players the importance of playing with their heart...it could make a difference in their athletic career.
* If you are a store owner, make a popular item a charity item, giving the charity the proceeds from sales. You can also donate items to charity auctions.
* Adopt a healthy habit for 2 weeks and inspire others to do the same
* Go to city council meetings and give input
* Give praise and positive attention to your children daily, and model behavior you seek from them
* If you choose to be on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram all day, then look for those who are going through a hard time, having a bad day or need a little pick me up and surprise them with a small note, flowers, candy, balloons or something you know they would like. Look for those doing great things and show them appreciation to keep them motivated and feeling like they are making a difference too.
I could go on and on...

As for me, I am dedicated to doing things that make happiness and joy contagious.  Helping people see the value of one smile, even in a day of several frowns. Helping create situations where there's no option of an outcome other than joy. I should work on smiling more. Something small, and sort of silly, I would like to do is fill my friend's social media news feed with positive and uplifting pictures and articles and quotes so they get a break from all the negative. Keeping in mind that others matter, no matter where they are in life, there is always room for making a difference. Once you begin transforming into a difference maker, you are already ahead in making a difference in your own life.

So, go make a plan difference makers! Based on your interpretation of what "living" means to you, what part will you play in keeping people "alive"?

Peace and Joy,
Beth

Do Unto Others...

Yesterday (mid-morning), as I was running around like a crazy woman with a packed schedule, I realized I hadn't seen Melissa in a while. I knew she was going to be doing some yard work, so I peeked outside and she was nowhere in sight. As I continued to look for her, I realized she was in fact doing yard work...only it was in the neighbor's yard. She was working ever so diligently to make that yard in better shape for the little girls to play. I couldn't help but just smile. She does this without request, she does this out of the kindness of her own heart, expecting nothing in return. You see, she had a schedule to go by yesterday as well, but it didn't stop her. It suddenly slowed down the hectic pace of my day. I finally got to take time out of my busy schedule and enjoy something, even if it didn't involve me at all. I thank God for the ability to recognize the moment as one to ponder. It may sound petty, doing volunteer yard work for someone else, but if you saw the size of our yard and their yard, you would understand it is anything BUT petty. 

It kick-started my motivation for Joy Latte all over again. Doing good for others, just because....how delightful is that?! Seeing the simple act of someone doing for others, makes my cheeks pop with excitement. I am so so very excited about our upcoming JL project(s). More so now than ever. It has taken quite some time to fully develop the plan in its entirety, but I hope it will be well worth it. 

I encourage everyone to go out and do something nice for someone, whether it is someone close to you, or someone you've never met. And please don't engage in your generosity via social media...make it personal. Not just a facebook message, text or tweets. There is nothing like personal contact in this day in age. We get so involved in the lives of others through our phones, computers, tablets, etc, and we forget we have a life of our own in which we can do so many good things. So, instead of reading about someone's good day, be a part of that someone's good day. Start with a close friend, or a co-worker, a neighbor, your family. Start somewhere and let it be contagious! And if you decide to delve into this encouraging request, please tag #joylatte and tell us your story on how you made your little world a better place.

I ESPECIALLY encourage you to participate in these small acts of kindness if you are having a bad day. Nothing cheers me up more than being able to make someone else smile, laugh or feel surprised. It is the element of surprise that creates a whirlwind of emotions that can truly change someone's entire outlook on their day/mood...including your own. If there is not something good you can find in your day, create it. It's that simple. Don't let money be an issue either. I am not saying buy someone a vacation to Mexico. You can simply get a 6-pack of their favorite soda and wrap quotes around each can. You can bake cookies and bring them to work for no reason. You can simply tell someone they are awesome. 

If you every have trouble deciding what do to, always remember the golden rule.

So go now, and do unto others...

Peace and Joy,
Beth

Aftermath

I am not even sure where to begin with this entry. Several states just endured a 4 day monster that ripped through and brought devastation over many. I am used to hurricanes, I am used to unpredictable weather...this however...this was scary. There were over 130 tornadoes reported, lives lost, homes uprooted, hail damage and the flooding...oh my dear, the flooding. Needless to say, anyone in the path of these storms took a beating. I have never experienced hail like that, nor have I ever been so thankful for large closets, but all in all, we came out of it much better off than a whollllle lot of other people. I found myself suddenly realizing how many people I know that were in the line of destruction.

I am lost for words looking at all the pictures, videos, news casts and Facebook posts. Reading blogs and different perspectives of the same storm. It is crazy how your neighbor is left with nothing but a slab while your house is merely missing a few shingles. Seeing pictures of how Ono Island became Oh No Island. Pensacola is under water, as are parts of South Alabama.The damage in all states impacted...it is incomprehensible.

You see stories of parents protecting children, pets being found, boats being carried miles and miles away. You see household items floating down what used to be a street. You see cars filling up with water, you see shreds of wood from what used to be a house. You see vehicles in sinkholes, items impaled in trees and people literally kayaking down the street to help others who are stranded on top of their house or car. You see people trying to pick up pieces of their life, what little they can find of it. You see all of this and it makes you just want to cry, or understand or just scream.

If I had enough arms I would hug everyone who was impacted. If I had enough money I would help rebuild, replace and restore. If I had enough belongings, I would donate it all. I see communities coming together, I see volunteers risking their own safety to help others. It's a beautiful thing, really. It is almost contagious. So what do I have enough of, I ask myself. Well, hope is pretty infinite, and so is compassion and effort. I also have the beautiful power of prayer. Ideas start unfolding, enveloping my every thought, and suddenly I am compelled to do SOMETHING. I feel if I am able, I should....right?

So maybe it will be a fundraiser, maybe it will be an item raiser...maybe it will be a huge Joy Latte project. The fact that I can generate several ideas in such a short amount of time makes me realize there is really no reason to not help. It is about realizing you have a purpose in life, and utilizing that purpose for the better of the communities, people and support that surrounds tragedies such as this.

Most of you still have a house on a street that you can still drive down in a car that you still have with someone is the passenger seat that is still alive. Imagine if ALL of that was taken from you at one time.

I refuse to call this the aftermath.Think about it...what is the true aftermath of tragedy? Overcoming it, right? I believe the aftermath of this will be communities rebuilt with compassion, more pride for those communities and a new chapter for those involved. Everything may have washed away for some, but what is yet to come can be a beautiful thing. Strength, bravery, effort, love, commodore, hope and revitalization.....THAT is what defines the aftermath....THAT is what will be remembered.

Peace and Joy,
Beth

Faith Hope and Love

Not many people would consider themselves "proud" to be questioning their faith and their views and their standing with God, but I am, and here is why:

The constant questions I have regarding my Christianity is not a sign of weakness, rather, they are slight signs of doubt. I am not saying doubt it good, because I am well aware that doubt errs on the side of Satan, but doubt is what reminds me that I have something stronger than that doubt. I have faith, I have hope and I have love. I push through doubt because I remind myself to trust God and His will He has for me. Sometimes it is hard to go through my daily routine giving grace and thanks for all I am blessed with, so when issues and circumstances arise where doubt surfaces, I am reminded that I need to take time to be thankful. The questions and the doubt reign me back in, as if they are my daily reminders to not get so distracted in fear and worry that I forget to have faith and trust.

Externally, how does one NOT have questions about their faith? There are so many denominations, so many beliefs, so many practices, traditions and ways to worship. There are questions of who's beliefs are right and who's are wrong. And we mustn't forget the one of the most powerful external factor in faith: the influence of others. We are all susceptible to falling victim to damning remarks from others based on faith. People will even basically tell you that you aren't a Christian unless you live your life just like they do. Don't get me wrong, I have the utmost respect for people who believe they are doing God's work, but I just don't believe God wants people to believe they are more "right" in their practices than others.

Internally, I have grown to understand that my relationship with God is just that....MINE. I make a conscious effort on a daily basis to share the bonds of that relationship through good deeds, prayer and love. Recently, I have delved more into deeper meanings and the foundation of my relationship with Him, and I feel comfortable saying that while I am not perfect, I am still a follower of Christ. 

We are currently seeking a church to attend regularly, and while there are so many out there, I am starting to wonder if it matters which I choose. I am learning that it is not up to the pastor, preacher, priest...etc to persuade me to believe, think or feel one way or another about the message. It is MY responsibility to read and understand that scripture or message, and what it means to me and how God intends on it to pertain to my life and my understanding of His word. I am proud of the personal relationship I have with God, and so I try not to let others influence my spiritual reflection because, just to be honest, it does not concern anyone else but He and I. I am consistently growing in my faith, and I am comfortable sharing my faith and love, but I will not sacrifice the relationship I have with Him based on other people believing they are more "right" in their ways of living.  I do not understand how we can diversify Christianity when in the end we are all striving for the same fundamental unity. 

Every day is a chance to grow, and every day I choose to try harder to seek out those opportunities. Again, I am not perfect, but I perfectly okay with that. 

Peace and Joy,
Beth

Strides

We made it through to another week!

Many of you know through my other blogs that I am working on improving my overall health. Well, I have made some strides toward this effort, and the simple act of merely starting this project already has me feeling better.

My first step: Buying new running shoes. Why is this so great? I am now void of excuses for why I am not running. This step was more than just buying shoes...it was a realization. I now see that the REAL first step in getting to a better you is to get rid of all of your excuses. Excuses become crutches, and those crutches give us something to lean on when, in reality, we are able enough to utilize our under-appreciated amount of strength to push through.

Second step: Spectator Burnout. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE watching, cheering and supporting MJ and others on their big days and HUGE accomplishments, but there comes a time when you ask yourself, "Why is it again that I am not out there with them again?" This question surfaced in my thought process as I stared at the finish line of the Gulf Coast Half Marathon this weekend in Pensacola. It was the first time I truly missed the thrill of the challenge. I am so blessed and so proud of the fact that I know someone who endures this challenge frequently, but it is time I become proud of myself as well. I will always continue to support and spectate at these events, only now I want to do it as a participant. I want to share the experience, talk about the challenges and celebrate the victory. It's about time.

Third step: Picked out a race. I am highly considering the Kaiser Half Marathon in Gulf Shores. It is in November, so I have PLENTY of time to train....with no excuses. I don't care if I don't break 2:30, I just want to finish....to accomplish the taste of victory that I have been neglecting myself of. It's nice to be thirsty for a challenge...and it will be nice to quench that thirst with success.

Next step: Get Healthy! I will choose better foods, I will take care of myself. There are people out there who would give anything to have a healthy body. People with disease, illnesses, terminal conditions and so on. When taking on that perspective, how can I NOT take more care of myself. I sometimes take my health for granted, and it's time I develop and maintain consistent healthy habits. Let's get real, though: I will be realistic with this goal, so treating myself from time to time is going to happen.

Having said all of this, it makes it muuuuch easier to attain these goals when I am surrounded by the very best people who exemplify such a lifestyle. MJ is an every day inspiration, we can all see why. She is the epitome of fitness. Life has handed her cards that could have ceased all motivation, but no...not her. She pushed through. She has the mentality I strive for, and I am proud to say I am getting there. I don't expect to be as fast as her or as strong as her (right now at least ;) ), however I will be crossing the same finish lines, going to the same gym, and trying just as hard as she does. I know plenty of other runners too..several of my closest friendships developed BECAUSE of running. How could I give up something that has done so much for me?!

My sister, Nikki, lives by the phrase, "Live free", and it has changed her perspective on a lot of life perceptions. She has a free spirit and it seems to work for her, so I will take it one step further for my health goals and say "live free from excuses".

Thanks to the support and encouragement from the people closest to me, I feel like this goal is already getting easier.

Peace and Joy,
Beth